Friday, March 12, 2010

Senseless Rambling

The title is pretty corny. But I've been kind of annoyed lately. I opened a formspring account and literally MOST of the questions are about girlfriends. Like 3 out of 10 aren't about girls, and it's just really overwhelming. People send me link to gossip sites asking me if something is true, or if the pictures are "photoshopped" and just asking millions of things that really shouldn't matter.

I released statements before... because I was trying to get over something, I was trying to get over the fact that my private life is no longer private. Everyone wants a little bit off of it, and get money from it.

I'm really in a cranky mood because I didn't get much sleep last night. I slept for at least 3 hours, and that's definitely not enough. I had too much on my mind. Too much to think about.. I was talking to someone special to me. And then I spent an hour thinking "What am I doing?" "Is this right or wrong?" "Am I happy?" "Am I on the RIGHT track?" You know just questioning every move I make ended up only with 3 hours of sleep, a huge massive head ache and a little bit unhappy. At least I had a big meal in the morning which I hardly ever get to have.

You know... thinking about it, I KNOW I am blessed. I'm leaving the dream, and I'm so blessed that I get to. I also have bad days, where I was just want to quit. I want to leave, I want to stop pretending sometimes. But it comes with territory when I chose to do this. The difference is... that I was young when I chose to do this. I didn't know that I'd have to give up my private life, and half my happiness to give people my music.

All I've ever wanted to do is music. I've always wanted to be a musician. I don't like acting, I don't like modeling, I don't like that stuff. Yeah, I do them but it's because it is part of my contract. But I'm not really into acting, I guess its fun sometimes. But my thing is music, I live, breathe and love music. I've never even dreamed of doing anything else until I signed with Disney and completely lost control of my life. That sounds dramatic, but if I'm not filming JONAS, I'm doing a movie, if I'm not doing a movie, I'm traveling doing PR and stuff. It gets really draining and I wish I could tune it down and just do the thing I love most which is music.

I'm so upset about some things and it's mainly that I have to hide so many things because I'm afraid. The media has ruined some things for me before, and I feel like they're out to do it AGAIN. Can't a 17 year old guy have his privacy? Have something to himself only? All of a sudden so many people want to know about what's going on with Selena, if we broke up or what not. Or if I'm "fighting" with Liam? Why do you guys care so much? Nothing happened. I didn't fight anyone, I didn't break-up with anyone. I'm just living my life the way I should. Things shouldn't be the way they are. What is the media trying to do exactly? create a "celebrity" by ruining their personal life? I don't understand.

I opened an account so I could answer some questions and I get SO many rude comments about how Liam is better than I am, or how I am better than Liam or how Selena is better than Miley or Miley is better than Selena. Guys, we're HUMAN? God created us to be equal but independent. No one's better or worse than anyone. Liam is a great actor, he did a great job in The Last Song with Miley. I don't KNOW the guy that well, I'm not going to sit and bash him? There's no point in that. He is a nice person from what I've seen, and people seriously need to leave that alone. Same with Selena, she's such a great person to me. She actually sits down and listens to me and helps me out with whatever problem I have. We do things we enjoy together, and we always have a great time. Miley is my best friend, she's hilarious and fun. She's always making me smile and making sure I have a great time with her, and I love that too. And I KNOW I'm a good guy. I know that there's million of people out there that musically are a LOT better and more talented that I am, but I'm the person that gets to live my dream. Let me live it alone. I know I'm talented too. I'm a good song-writer and may not be the best singer but I'm a good musician and I'm a GOOD person. I know I inspire many people and get them through things with my music. That's why I'm here, to reach out to people as I live my dream. WHY ruin someone's private life when all they're doing is living their dream? I don't understand.
They want to see us with someone and we HAVE to do it to make people happy. What happened to OUR happiness too? Does it mean anything to the media? NO, it doesn't as long as they're making good money. To them we're like one of those animals stuck in a zoo. We amuse people with our personal life and it gets overwhelming.

Then I get someone making FUN of my diabetes? seriously? how low can people go to tear someone down? Yes, I'm diabetic, and I help people with struggles too. I give them something to believe in. I give them hope and let them know that they're STILL people and shouldn't be afraid of living their dream because of a struggle. I live with it everyday, I check my blood sugar, I inject insulin, I work out everyday, I avoid eating sweets, I eat healthy food. And I try to juggle it with the MEDIA barging in my life, tour, filming and making music. What else can I DO to make people happy? I'm TRYING, but sometimes it just makes me want to quit too. It makes me sick to my stomach how people can be so judgmental and careless about someone.

Honestly I don't KNOW how some people do it. I don't know how Miley does it. She's come to me crying because people are so rude to her everyday. How people shout in the streets calling her a slut or a whore, when she's the complete OPPOSITE of that. Demi came to me crying because people were saying she's too pale and she's "emo" and made fun of her sister's weight. Guys that's horrible. When did bullying someone became so much fun? We all might be confident, but we all have a line that people crosses sometimes. We're human beings. We CAN get self-conscious.

We need to stop the hate... we need to stop all together. Look who the world is reacting to it? Did you know Chile had another earthquake? do you know how many people are getting raped out there? How many pedophiles are in this world taking childs? People just care, the MEDIA just cares about tearing us down and bullying us. When I KNOW I'd pay a milliom dollars for a good story about the world that surrounds us. Where we LIVE. We're all human beings. We're all people. Don't judge someone because of their way of life, their struggles, their believes. Be open minded. The world needs us right now. We need each other. And you know it. Specially right now. Let's all actually make a change. Let's stick together instead of AGAINST each other so much. Stop making wars and start making friendships. Don't let the devil take over.

This has gotten so bad now, and it's really sad. And I'm so overwhelmed. Try listening to "Man In The Mirror" by Michael Jackson or "We Are The World". The guy was a genius.

Let's try to be the change we want to see. I'll leave you guys with this to think about.


P.S. One spark stars a fire


  1. Ya know, people will say what they wanna say. I know it's tough to deal with all the crap you get, I know it's hard to see the light in anything when people are cramming you with stupid questions.

    Delete all the stupid ones, about girlfriends and you hating Liam (which I always knew wasn't true) and focus on the ones that make sense to you.

    I don't get how you feel, I am not famous. But I don't think I've ever asked you about your personal life, it's none of my business. Do I care about you ? YES. Do I care about your happiness ? YES. But I don't like seeing you like this, and I think that if it makes you THIS unhappy then maybe you should take a break ? I dunno.

    It's just sad to see someone I care about SO much be so unhappy, it really kills me.

    As for the moron who made fun of your diabetes, they're just sick minded people who have no life. But you made a point, never to let Diabetes get you down and you're a beautiful person and I think, you're becoming a wonderful young man.

    So, remember the people that DO love you and SUPPORT you, because at the end of the day, they'll get you through. And even though you don't know me, I am always here for you and I'll always support you, in whatever you do.

    Keep your head up.


  2. It really kills me to read this. You don't deserves it, no one does. People should just understand that your hearts and feelings don't get replaced by some robot kind-ish thing, that makes you immune against all that crap that the media and some horrible people says and writes. Not that it is so easy to do, but when the world feels against you, think of every fan that will allways have your back. all of your friends and family that will support you and be there to hold you up through it all.
    and you're right, you are a great musician, and a brilliant song-writer. as well as a human being.
    keep doing what you love, you do it great!

  3. There is a lot of ignorance in this world. People who call themselves "fans" that say that they love you but do not like YOUR choices.... I'm sick of these "fans" giving us REAL fans a bad name. I could not care less about who you are dating as long as you are happy. I just want to hear you sing, and for you to continue to make amazing music, and to continue inspiring people. I admire your dedication to helping people learn about diabetes, especially since where I live is one of the countries where most of the population are or will soon be diabetic.
    Keep your head held high, be proud of what you have accomplish and what you will continue to accomplish, in music, and in life. Be happy and be well. Ignore the hate, the criticism, the hurtful words; even when it's a hard thing to do, for someone like you is a necessity to ignore it. You are a special person, you have a one in a million soul that makes you who you are, don't allow people dim your light because of stupidity and lies. Your true fans will be with you no matter what, following you and cheering you on. I understand your friendship with Miley because I have that with my ex; but closed-minded people would just say that your relationship has to be something more than friendship, when in reality the friendship works 100 times more perfectly than the relationship ever did. At least that's how it is for me and my best friend. I have heard Liam say great things about you, I've always liked him, but seeing how he handles questions about you and Miley makes me like you all even more. Makes me feel proud to see how mature you all are for your age, more so than many older people I know. I know that Demi has been hurt because of comments, I still don't know where they come from, I support her no matter what, but I do wish she had as good as a relationship with Selena that she had before. Selena... I love her to death, she's an inspiration to me, and whatever makes her happy makes me happy. I hope your friendship with her continues because it is a beautiful one to see. I know all of these people and many more, including your family, are your support. Lean on them when you need to, and lean on US when you need to. “Our strength grows out of our weaknesses” (Ralph Waldo Emerson)
    I love you, I'm here for you always

  4. i completely agree with EVERYTHING you just wrote.-
    I APPLAUD you for standing up for yourself and your best friends....HONESTLY!!! =)

    I HATE what the media are trying to do.It's like they are more focused on the celebrities,than the actual stories that are out there,unfortunately all we do have,are the newspapers to inform us.Plus,i DON'T buy magazines,cause i KNOW they are all nothing but stupid gossip.It's sad that it takes a disaster for them to actually then,focus on whatever is happening.As you said there are SO MANY things going on in the world.(I believe that with a passion too)

    As far as the bullying,it's something that i know about..but to have to deal with it publicly is not only humiliating but ridiculous,and for grown adults to pick on teenagers (which is exactly what it is!!!) but also jealous teens to pick on people they don't even know personally.They just have no lives!

    As far as the things that have been said about you,miley+demi is 'MIND BLOWING'!! YOUR ALL sooo talented and NO-ONE deserves those kind of things said to them.I hope you realize there are ALOT of people who do admire and respect you hard as it is to take in the hate,remember for every hater,you have a fan who will ALWAYS have your back!! xo
    You are very talented,i bought your Album and it was-FANTASITC (not just saying that);)

    PS-I personally don't care about your personal life,honestly!! you know who you want in your life,and that's all that matters! (it's your life)
    sorry for this long comment! but i had to write something... =)

  5. I don't how it is, all I know is I love you for who you are, and not "the guy they wanna show to all the fans" I've never believed in that crap, seriously, I don't like gossip, they're talking about every single thing you guys do, if you are eating, playing, and almost everytime they are LYING, I love your music, not your personal bussiness, because IT'S PERSONAL, I wouldn't like to know that every persona on the face of the Earth know every detail about my relationships, if I'm sad or happy or whatever, it's MY PROBLEM, not their problem... I don't care gossip, I love your music, your brothers, I love you... I RESPECT YOU!!! You changed my life, seriously. (:

    YOU ARE SO TALENTED AS OTHERS MUSICIANS, AND EVEN MORE, You rock, you can be whoever you want, just keep fighting as you've been doing it. With God we can do anything we want.

    And if you are tired of all and you wanna quit or something I respect all your choices, because I love you and I wish you ALL THE BEST. You are so strong.

    God Bless,

  6. Great blog post nick. And I agree Michael Jackson was a genius, his message was that if we expect change it must start from within

    God bless, L.O.V.E

  7. Reading this made me so upset.

    It makes me sick to think that there are people out there who only care about who you are/aren't dating, and they think they deserve to know everything about your private life. You should never have to feel forced to reveal information just because people are bugging you about it. And I can't even imagine how much it upsets you, if I'm so upset over this.

    You are an amazing, talented, and kind person. Why does it matter who you're dating, or fighting with, or whatever? It doesn't. If you want something kept private, that is your right. It kills me that people don't respect that.

    I hate to see you so torn. I hate that your frustrated and hurting so much. I think maybe a break, an escape would be something that would be good for you. I don't know how that could really happen because there's papparazzi everywhere, but I think if you took some time away you could come back renewed and strengthened so you can face the crazy world that is being a celebrity.

    Just remember that you have so many people around you who love and support you. Your family, friends, and those of us fans who actually care about your music and you, regardless of your personal life. I hope you know that fans like that are out there. I am one of them. I will support you no matter what, and as long as you're doing something that makes you happy, that's great.

    Thank you for being so open with all of us, and for doing things for your fans. We don't deserve how wonderful you are to us, so thank you. We ALL love you!


  8. Nick,

    This honestly is making me cry reading this. Literally. Look, I know that sometimes I can be a little abrupt - but I think you know that at the end of the day, I TRULY, honestly and truly care about your happiness. Sometimes I laugh at myself about that, but it's true. I do. So sue me. haha!

    When I heard that someone made fun of your diabetes, I am telling you, I wanted to hunt that person down and tell them a thing or two. Or three. DELETE all the mean questions. Don't feed the fire of ignorance.

    I feel so bad for you, because I can't imagine what it must be like for you. I can try to sympathize, but I can't empathize. There are very few people who can, and that's why it's good you and Miley are so close, because that is something else that you can share that the other understands.

    I admire your candidness ( is that a word?? hmm) You have impressed me so much. Your candor! HA. I just thought of the word. I admire your candor.

    IT SUCKS BEYOND BELIEF THAT YOU HAVE TO LIVE YOUR LIFE LIKE THIS, hiding, or withholding, or whatever. Is that fair? Is that a fair thing for someone to ask of you or for you to have to ask of yourself? Heck no.

    Just remember that at the end of the day, I want you happy. Bottom line. That's my motivation.

    Okay, well I'll stop there I guess.

    I am so sorry and wish I could help you more.

    Love, your friend :)

  9. You know, I didn't finish saying everything I wanted to so I decided to just DO IT! Screw what anybody thinks!!

    Your blog freaked me out a bit, mainly because the tone of it was SO sad. I am really worried about you! It felt like a SCREAM for help, so I am going to scream back. We all have our good days and bad days. Trust me, I know this as well as, if not better than anybody. But you shouldn't be this unhappy. I don't know your life, but clearly your living with a lot of rules and pressures. We all have to do things we don't want to sometimes, things we "have" to do, but this is different. I know you wanted to be successful, but why do you have to compromise your VERY being to get there? You shouldn't have to.

    Do your parents even know you feel this way?

    And as for the media... I am amazed that you guys are all as sane as you are with the ridiculous pressure you are under. And I wish I could tell you it will get better, but i think we both know it won't. I don't mean to sound harsh by saying that either.

    People will always want a "piece" of you. Just don't ever let them get all of you. People will always want to know about your love life and that kind of thing. It's not right, but it's reality. It won't change, so you have to. You have to find a way within yourself to deal with it. Here's where a friend like Miley or Demi can help you because you are all in it together.

    And this may be stating the obvious, but getting some SLEEP will help you too. I'll bet you're cranky! Our bodies aren't meant to function like that. I have been tired to the point of TEARS. Literally crying because I was just so tired but didn't have the chance to sleep enough. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.

    Anyway, I will stop here for REAL this time because I sound like a mother hen!! I do realize that. I just don't like hearing you or ANYBODY so sad.

    And remember how much people care about you. REMEMBER THAT.